Things that make me angry/sad:
- We are studying in your apartment, and you look up at me and say, "Bekah, I'm really fucked up." While you are in the shower, I write you a letter with all the reasons why you are good, leave it on your pillow, and tell you to read it every night before you go to sleep. You thank me, but I know that you do not believe me.
- I wake up in the morning to 2 am texts that you are having another rough night. I call you to tell you that I love you and ask if you want me to come over. "It doesn't matter," you say. "You matter," I reply, and you laugh.
- We are out for dinner, and I tell you that I think your heart is heavy. You say that you don't want to talk about it, and I wonder if it's because you're afraid that I will get angry with you again. I'm sorry that sometimes my blood boils hotter than I mean to.